Hah - you thought you got rid of me!

Time delays.
Yes, I've been offline for a while. I was being distracted by life, the universe and EVERYTHING. Sometimes your whole world can change in a very short period of time, and it takes a bit to reorganize.

Gene Simmons.
Why is this guy everywhere I look all of a sudden? And more importantly, why am I starting to watch it? Ok, so I must admit, I'm not a fan of KISS. I don't dislike them, I just don't particularly LIKE them. It's cool they do what they do, good for them - but KISS has never graced my CD or cassette collections. (Yes, I said cassettes - remember them?) That being said, I, of course, know who Gene Simmons is, and can recognize him with or without makeup. I am aware of his Gene Simmons Family Jewels show, but have never seen an episode. (Strangely enough, I've recently learned that my dad likes to watch that show.) The other night, the "Roast of Gene Simmons" was on and somehow, my TV got stuck on that channel and I ended up watching the whole thing. Yesterday, I watched my first (and hopefully only) episode of "Are you smarter than a 5th grader" because he was on it. I was surprised to find out he had been a teacher at one point, and speaks a number of different languages. Surprised because, to be honest, I thought he was probably not the smartest guy on the planet. Turns out I was wrong and here I am admitting it. Good for you Gene, you're not a moron in makeup!

Oh yea, WINTER.
It snowed a bit today, reminding me that winter is about to pounce on us. Hopefully this winter doesn't seem as long as last winter. Last winter was too cold and too snowy for too long. Now that I have more distractions in my life than I did last year - that might make it go by quicker. As I was packing up all (well not ALL, there is still a ghost in the tree out front) the Halloween decorations, I realized that suddenly xmas will be upon us. While I do like seeing friends and family over the holidays, I'm not much of a xmas person. I don't have an xmas tree, yes it's Xmas to me, I don't listen to holiday music, I don't watch endless reruns of horrible holiday movies and I sure as hell don't have a special outfit OR anything dressy for all these holiday events I attend. (I do NOT wear dresses unless I'm in a wedding FYI. Skirts = no.) I participate in gift giving because the gifts I do give out are usually for people I like giving gifts to. Anyways, taking down the halloween decorations and being reminded about xmas got me to thinking about stupid holiday decorations. I don't really decorate much - though last year we did plug in some rope lights and toss them around the one tree out front. I like the holiday lights on houses for some reason. So this year we'll do that I'm sure, but other than that, I don't have much in the way of winter decor. I have a glass snowflake I put up in a window - how fancy is that? But yea, I don't have much else. Maybe this year I'll find some wintery stuff to put around the house so I don't get SO bored of the inside of my house that I go crazy (again). Lame, I know, but that's how it goes sometimes.

___________________________

A bit of ranting about randomness.

What’s with all the stupid pillows?
Why is it that people like to litter their bed with all sorts of useless pillows? You know what I mean, all those decorative pillows that get tossed onto the floor when the bed becomes functional. Maybe one or two can be dealt with, but what about all those people that have half the bed filled with these stupid things? I fail to understand why people waste time and money on them.

Oh sure, my FRIEND.
Facebook and other sites have a wonky definition of friend. When I see someone with a list of over 1000 friends, I can’t help but think “right, you personally know and consider EVERY one of these people your FRIEND.” The word friend is being sadly misused these days. Your stupid name on a so-called friend list does not make you my friend, and if you aren’t my friend for real, you’re not on my list.

Twisted sense of humour?
I was asked the other day if I have a twisted sense of humour. I just about fell out of my chair. HELL YES I DO. Little did they know just how twisted but they’ll learn. One day I’ll tell them about my site and let them in on a few more twisted moments. Sure I haven’t updated a lot in the last while, but who says I have to? It’s still good for killing some time if you’re bored and that’s all it’s meant to be. Sure no one comments on my blog here but I don’t need any. I’ll keep babbling on all I want!

Shut up you crazy bitches.
The worst commercials I've seen lately are those with the UK chick who has somehow found the biggest loser women on the planet and decided that they should all talk about how they have OCD issues with cleaning. The one even goes on about how she LOVES to do laundry. Whatever drug she's on, they need to up it until she OD's and dies. Then they yammer on about their toilet paper. WHO CARES?! Sure people like to have a clean house but we like to have LIVES even more. They all make me want to puke, spraying it all over their chemical-laden houses. Sure they'd probably get off on cleaning it, but I shouldn't have to hear another damned commercial about them.

A bit for April.

Not all women like chocolate.
I don't know where this stereotype of women loving chocolate comes from. I for one don't like it much. Out of all the men and women I know, there are WAY more men that LOVE chocolate. These guys will buy bags of chocolate and consume several bars of it at a time, and do this at least once a week. I know men that simply can not turn down a triple-layered chocolate cake with fudge in it. I know men that get chocolate for the holidays and have it ALL consumed by the end of the evening. So I simply don't understand all these stupid commercials that like to go on about women loving chocolate when there seems to be more men out there who do. Why do chocolate companies like to ignore these men who consume it in vast amounts and market only to women? (Candy/chocolate image link)

I'm glad I'm ME.
Lately I've been made aware that having a imaginative, creative and abstract mind are true gifts. I'm glad I can enjoy these things about myself and embrace them. These things have defined my life and allowed me to enjoy it - so I'm truly glad it's part of me and encourage everyone else to celebrate this part of themselves too. Go on, take a few minutes and be crazy.

WHY isn't it spring yet?!
It snowed yesterday - SNOWED. It's APRIL and it SNOWED. Sure, you could say that I should just suck it up, that I live in Canada and deal with it. Well I say SHUT UP to you. Winter has been long and cold this year, so I demand that spring do it's job and let me go enjoy my backyard again.

Easter can cram it.
As I mentioned above, I don't like chocolate. Easter seems to be ALL about chocolate, so it's a pretty useless holiday for me.

List of reasons why easter sucks.
Full sized easter bunny cramming it on DeviantArt.

So long, and thanks for all the fish.

So long, and thanks for all the fish.
30 years since Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy debuted on BBC radio.
Wow, 30 years! It's been around as long as I have and making people laugh for twice as long. I've loved this book since the first time I read it, and then all the rest of them. To pay homage I've re-read my all-in-one edition of the series. Everyone should read this book, well, those with a sense of humour and a liking for a bit of science-fiction. Douglas Adams was brilliant and obviously had a wonderful sense of humour. I would love to be able to write like he did - but no one will ever match him. It's too bad he had to leave this planet when he did - maybe one day he'll return with his towel.
THE answer to life, the universe and everything.

If I had an alien spaceship I would...
Of course it's a super-speedy ship that goes faster than the speed of light. Don't ask how, just wear your seatbelt if you ever happen to be in one.
Visit Jupiter.
Visit Saturn.
Visit where ever the ship was from.
Buzz the rovers on Mars to give NASA and everyone else something to talk about.
Find the Voyager space-crafts and give them a bit of a boost - just for the hell of it.
Hover above the capitals of all the major nations in the world to freak everyone out.
Visit Venus.
Visit the asteroid belt and gather up a few of them to take home for my backyard.
Visit the rest of the planets.
Visit Pluto and mock it for no longer being a planet.
Visit Deneb and see if it's got any planets orbiting around it.
Find a few other decent stars and check out their orbiting planets.
Hover above random little towns and shower down strange rocks from other planets in non-major nations around the world so they've got something new to show and tell the world.
Figure out all the alien systems on board and produce some really awesome pizza with their food creators.

Importing all my CDs.
The last few weeks I've been importing all of my many CDs into my computer. I've got about 50 more CDs to go and then I should be done. Mind you, I'm not importing ALL the songs off of each, just those I actually like. So far it's only come to 2.33 GB, which isn't too bad. I used to have about 350-400 CD's but dropped down to about 200 a few years ago, so I'm pleased that this little project hasn't sucked up 10 GB of space. And yes, these are all LEGIT CD's, not burnt copies or anything like that. I haven't bought many CD's in the last few years, normally getting others to buy them for xmas or birthday gifts now. Of course, I still collect my Patton-related CD's but other than that, I've really reigned in my CD addiction.

Is it SPRING yet????
I've had enough of all this snow and cold for now. I'm ready for SPRING. I don't want it to melt all at once but it would be nice to have it start to go away. I want to be able to go out in my backyard again and sit on my deck. I'd like to be able to go outside without having to put on layers of clothes and brace myself for the cold. I want my backyard back!!!!! Come on spring - we've all had enough of this winter already - give us some WARMTH!!!

So what?!

Updates & stuff.
There is a new list on TheInsaneDomain - Job hunting sucks! -
And FINALLY, the ask insane questions is working, and will continue to work from now on. There were some issues with the server it was on, and hardware being what it is, sometimes this happens. BUT it's up and running now, so you can once again pelt me with your insane questions and ask me for my fabulous advice. Of course, if you do something stupid as a result of my advice, I'm not legally responsible.

WHY don't more people comment?
Come on, I'm writing tons of totally useless stuff on here - why isn't anyone telling me how wonderful it all is? Oh, probably because it's not. Well screw you then. That's right, I said it and you can't stop me. I could say almost anything here because no one is actually reading this other than myself and some freak with no life (probably, though that could be me too.)

WHY would anyone want to be with Brett Michaels?
He's not only ugly, but UGLY. Also, come on, he's probably crawling with every disease known to mankind. I hate these stupid shows where people compete to be the mate of some other idiot - let's face it - they're all there to have their stupid faces on TV and the rest is just voyeuristic GARBAGE! People who watch this are just there to spy on the sex habits of others - probably because they aren't getting any or much for themselves. This is beyond trashy novels, it's trash TV at it's worst.

Even shows like Hell's Kitchen, which is supposed to be about COOKING, have cameras in the bedrooms. WHY???? Is there no such thing as privacy anymore? It's okay to just sign over all your rights to be on some damned TV show? There should be a law against cameras in bathrooms and bedrooms, and while we're at it, laws against cameras in cars that are taping the person driving the vehicle. They're supposed to be DRIVING! Safety FIRST!

Another shot of insanity.

Oh look, it's back!
That's right, I've brought back the Insane Q&A section on TheInsaneDomain.com Now people can pelt me with annoying and insane questions, and I get to give them smartass replies. I can hardly wait and I know you can't either. Go on and ask me stuff NOW - http://theinsanedomain.com/Main/askjcp.htm

And a new list.
For some reason people keep searching the term "ways to masterbait" and they somehow keep coming up with my site. So to give them something to read, I made up this list to help them out. http://www.theinsanedomain.com/Articles/lists/masterbait.htm

Valenwhat?
No, I don't celebrate that silly valentines day thing. It's not my style. I don't like chocolate and I don't like having flowers slowly die in my house. Luckily, my husband knows this and doesn't bother doing anything, which is how he shows that he truly knows me.

Family day?
This Monday is apparently an official day off and called Family Day. We have to spend every other holiday with our families, why the hell can't we have a Loner Day where we get to be alone, enjoy something by ourselves and not have to hang out with our family? We all need time to ourselves to enjoy just doing what we want, and it seems like every time we get a holiday, we're supposed to go annoy relatives. Well I don't think that's fair. Let's give our relatives some much needed time away from us and celebrate "Loner Day". Take the phone off the hook, log out of your messenger and email and just do whatever you want without having to deal with any other humans. What a holiday that will be!

Typing with feet.
I saw a girl on TV who can type faster than most people I know and she does it with her feet. HER FEET. That is pretty damned impressive. Sure I'd rather not use the same keyboard as her, but then again I don't really like using the same keyboard as anyone else period. It's insane the sorts of things that can be found in keyboards, not to mention all the nasty germs on them. Turn your keyboard upside down and give it a shake and you'll see the sorts of stuff that gets dropped in there. Ick.

More randomness.

Damn it's COLD.
It's been really cold out the last few days. Snow has fallen, winds have blown and it keeps getting colder. I've decided that I've had enough of winter for now, so it can go away. I'm ready for some warmer weather, open windows and being able to hang out in my backyard. So come on spring, I'm ready for you!

Rick Mercer.
I've been watching more of his show lately and he's crazy. CRAZY. Ive seen him in a car derby, racing cars on ice, jumping naked into some ICE cold water, and doing some synchronized swimming with the Canadian Olympic team. He's crazy. Just thought I'd share that with you all.

Stranger in a strange land.
I just finished reading this book by Robert A. Heinlein and I must admit, I was disappointed. It was horribly sexist, boring and drags on without anything interesting going on. Some guy was raised on mars and no one pelts him with questions about how he was raised, what the martians are like or anything? How boring. I expected so much more from it. Now it's onto Journey to the Center of the Earth by Jules Verne. So far it's not bad, so I hope it continues on that way.

Random things I've read about lately.
Robonaut - http://robonaut.jsc.nasa.gov/
(Photos - http://robonaut.jsc.nasa.gov/gallery.htm )

Volcano - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Volcano
Animated volcano photo of Jupiter's moon Io - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Image:Tvashtarvideo.gif

Solar cycle - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Solar_cycle
We've just started a new solar cycle. Huzzah!

Astronomy Picture of the day - http://antwrp.gsfc.nasa.gov/apod/

Some of my latest photos and drawings - http://decoyrobot.deviantart.com/gallery/

A whole lot of nothing.

What is with winter?
Two weeks ago the ground was covered with at least six feet of snow. Last week it got insanely warm and all the snow melted away, leaving just a foot on the ground. Of course, all sorts of places got flooded and even we didn't escape nature's wrath. We ended up with about an inch of water in our laundry room. Luckily we caught it quickly, and a day was spent scrubbing it all away and disinfecting. We were one of the lucky ones, apparently some people ended up with a few FEET of water in their basements. That would suck a lot. Imagine all the stuff that would get destroyed if the bottom half of your place was filled with water. It would be a nightmare to clean up too.

Aliens.
So I was outside shoveling and some aliens pulled up in their spaceship. After asking for directions to the nearest moon (luckily for me it was easy to spot and all I had to do was point) they asked me if I wanted to hop in and tour the solar system with them. While I had always wanted to do this, they sort of smelled funny and they said I couldn't tell my husband before leaving. Since we have a standing rule about neither of us being allowed to take off in spaceships without the other, I had to politely decline.
Damn. Maybe next time.

2008.
Only two more years until we get a cool year. Instead of saying "two thousand and whatever" we'll be able to say "twenty-ten" and go up from there. It just sounds way cooler. At least it will until twenty-twelve and the whole world comes to an end. Thanks Mayans, thanks a lot. Figures that as soon as we get say something cool that you come along and ruin it two years into it. If you don't believe me, read it for yourself, they're not the only ones telling us these things.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/2012#Metaphysical_predictions

WTF Leafs?
Seriously, what the hell is going on? Why must you suck so much? Why must you give others even more reasons to make fun of us Leaf fans? WHY? Do something about it! Sigh.

De-humidifiers.
Why the HELL are they so much money? I'm outraged.

Are you still reading this crap?
I've babbled on about a lot of stupid crap here, and you're still reading? Wow. I'm impressed! You deserve a cookie and several cool points. Go on, take them.