You need to have a concert in Toronto so I can FINALLY see you jerks play live. I've been a fan FOREVER and it's just getting insulting that everyone but me has seen you in concert.
Better yet, come and play in my backyard. I think you owe me that.
YOU OWE ME.
YOU OWE ME!
Love and kisses, JCP
Dear Skittles,
Your commercial where the man can make things turn into skittles is ridiculous. There are a million things wrong with this commercial, but here is a short list for you to consider.
- The man is sitting at a desk, with a telephone and computer. If everything he touches turns to skittles, why the hell would anyone hire him for a desk job, much less assign a phone and computer to him?
- Why does he reach for the phone when he KNOWS that everything he touches will turn to skittles?
- If everything he touches turns to skittles, he should be stationed in major dumps all over the world, turning our garbage into something that people can eat. Sure, it isn't exactly healthy for people to consume nothing but skittles, but still, it's better than having garbage pile up, and better than eating nothing if you're starving.
- It shows him as depressed that this is happening, insunating that he does NOT like skittles and is fed up with them. This would lead people to think, oh that's right, skittles get boring after awhile because they're too sugary.
- Co-workers are taunting him, showing that they have no sensitivity for this man's odd condition, and are poisoning his work environment. Do you really support this sort of behavior in the workplace?
- Wouldn't it be better for this man to at least stay at home on disability, instead of risking the chance that he would trip and fall, turning the building into skittles and everyone in the building being killed/harmed?
Boos and hisses, JCP
Dear KFC,
Your holiday commercial is beyond ridiculous.What sort of people invite over their whole healthy-looking family over to their expensive house, get dressed up, set the dining table with nice dishes and napkins, and then proudly serve them a bucket of KFC?
NO KIND OF PEOPLE BEAUSE THAT WOULD NEVER HAPPEN.
The only way that would happen as shown in your commercial is if it were as a JOKE on those who were visiting. Even then, they would simply have gotten the bucket, refusing to allow your horrible food anywhere near their house and their childrens well-balanced diets. Get a grib.
If you want to have your commercial show reality, then show a family that is in their torn up pjs, staring at the tv so they don't have to talk to each other, look like they've endured the holiday from hell and are just hoping that they don't survive the year so they don't have to endure another. THAT is when people will break out the KFC during the holidays.
Boos and hisses, JCP
Dear Mike Patton,
YOU OWE ME.
YOU OWE ME!
Love and kisses, JCP
